It’s been a year since granddad Bert passed away on 1 October 2010. Around 60 descendants of George and Sarah Mankelow travelled the road to Ngaroma to remember him with a small ceremony at The Rock.
His eldest son Bob (my dad) summed it up for us all why our family is so strongly connected with each other and the place called Ngaroma.
“Bert loved it here,” said Bob.
“It’s about shared experiences,” he said. “It’s not just about shared blood; it’s about shared experiences here at this place, making memories together. Even those who left, still shared experiences together as the oldest ones came back and helped out.”
“He was looking forward to the reunion but he couldn’t hold on any longer. He just got tired. He said several times towards the end, I’m stuffed.”
Bob stepped back from the rock with a tear in his eye. A quiet “we miss you” was heard from his youngest brother Tim. The words each spoke were simple but from the heart and they had power. Power for all of us there, who were blessed to know, love, and be loved by Bert.
Tim scattered a few of Bert’s ashes around the base of the rock and as he screwed the new plaque onto the rock now bearing the last date, Bob read out the names.
“She had a lot of children,” said Bob, “No TV” quipped Tim.
We farewelled Bert in true Mankelow fashion, always with humour, washed down with a beer.
Buster also spoke from his heart and was inspired by the occasion to write a poem. It seemed appropriate then that someone – Judy? – said that this poem should be spoken each time we return to the rock. A new ritual for Ngaroma, a new way to remember those that have gone before. Many of those that were there finished the small ceremony in their own personal way, standing before the rock, reading out the names that meant the most to them, and remembering the stories of their past.
Buster’s poem
They travelled by foot and horse
A family of no fixed abode
Told of a promised land
35 miles from the crossroad
They pitched a tent and cleared the land
And made the most of their lot
Their names are etched here now
So they will not be forgot
Through the years of toil and sweat
They endure droughts and floods
But by the smiles upon their faces
There were no regrets
So as we stand here today
To remember our families and mates
We will always know they stand by us
Just leaning over the gate
So friends and family smile with them
For today is not the end
Our bonds are strong with family ties
So this is not the end.
Book launch - Memories of 100 years in Ngaroma
It seemed fitting while so many of us were gathered to hold the book launch – the culmination of four years of hard work by Chrissie Mankelow.
Buster speaking on behalf of the reunion committee said that some thought the book launch should wait until the reunion proper. “Lucky I don’t listen,” he said.
“It’s captured the crux of the reunion and has the makings of a good read,” said Buster describing the book.
“You’ll want at least five copies – one for each room of your house. It represents a lot of time and effort by a lot of people. This book is magnificent, something to be handed down to children, not just stuck in the bottom shelf and forgotten about."
A story about Chrissie and the book in the Waitomo News can be viewed online:
http://www.waitomonews.co.nz/issues/2011.09/2011.09.29.WN.pdf
Returning Bert to his Mum
The next day, Sunday, 30 of us gathered again, this time in Tauranga, as most of Bert’s ashes were interned into the ground on his mother’s grave.
Bert’s second son Ray welcomed us to the grave site and explained that this is where Bert wanted to be.
“He was quite clear,” said Ray. “We asked him where he wanted to go and he immediately said – with mum. What about with our mum we said. Yep sure. What about Ngaroma, yes that’s good too. But his first response was with his mum.”
It was a short ceremony, as fitting Bert’s straight-up lack-of-fuss approach to life. Each of us there took a moment to say goodbye to Bert and lay a Ngaroma daffodil before Bob filled in the hole. Then again, in the Mankelow way, we retired to have a drink and a good feed at Bob and Joc’s house
Bert may not be with us in body at the reunion coming up in January, but he will be there in spirit, in our blood and in our memories and shared experiences – including those we created this weekend by coming together to say goodbye to Bert.
Those of you on Facebook can view photos of the day posted by various relatives – most of which have been shared on the George and Sarah Mankelow group page.
